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Let’s be honest for a second…
The thing holding you back isn’t your strategy.
It’s not your pricing.
It’s not your audience.

It’s you.

Not in a harsh, tear-yourself-down kind of way—but in a you’re in your own way kind of way.

Because the truth is, most people don’t fail because they don’t know what to do.
They fail because they’re stuck overthinking, overanalyzing, and over-identifying with every move they make.

So if you’ve been waiting to feel “ready,” “confident,” or “validated” before you take action…

This is your wake-up call.

The Shift: What “Getting Over Yourself” Actually Means

Let’s redefine this, because it’s not about being dismissive or harsh with yourself.

Psychologically speaking, “getting over yourself” means:

  • Moving past excessive self-focus
  • Letting go of self-pity or inflated self-importance
  • Gaining perspective so you can move forward

And that last part? That’s everything.

Because when you’re stuck in your head, everything feels bigger than it actually is:

  • The fear
  • The risk
  • The judgment
  • The “what ifs”

But when you zoom out, you realize something that might feel uncomfortable—but also incredibly freeing:

Most people aren’t thinking about you.

Hard Truth: Nobody Is Thinking About You (Like That)

I know. That can land in two very different ways.

On one hand:

  • “Wow… that kind of sucks.”

On the other:

  • “Wait… that means I can do whatever I want.”

And that second realization? That’s where your power is.

Because if nobody is:

  • Overanalyzing your outfit
  • Judging your content
  • Watching your every move

Then what’s actually stopping you?

Most of the pressure you feel is self-created.
It’s rooted in this belief that you’re constantly being watched, evaluated, and judged.

But in reality?

Everyone is thinking about themselves.

And ironically, believing everyone is focused on you…
is just another form of self-focus.

The Validation Trap (And Why It’s Keeping You Stuck)

One of the biggest reasons people can’t move forward?

They’re addicted to validation.

  • “What do you think I should do?”
  • “Do you think this is good?”
  • “Should I go for it?”

And while feedback isn’t bad…

Relying on it to make decisions is.

Because when you constantly outsource your decisions:

  • You weaken your self-trust
  • You delay action
  • You stay stuck in indecision

The real question you should be asking is:

What do you think?

This is where confidence actually comes from—not from approval, but from ownership.

The Identity Shift: You’re the One Calling the Shots

When you stop looking outward for answers, something powerful happens:

You start making decisions based on:

  • Your values
  • Your vision
  • Your goals

Instead of:

  • Trends
  • Opinions
  • External expectations

For example, not every photographer wants to become an educator.
Some just want to create art—and they’re confident in that.

Why?

Because they’ve already decided who they are.

They’re not waiting for permission.
They’re not looking for validation.

They just… move.

The Breakthrough: Take Messy, Uncertain Action

Here’s where most people get stuck:

They think they need clarity before action.

But in reality?

Clarity comes from action.

You don’t figure it all out first.
You figure it out as you go.

That means:

  • Doing things scared
  • Making imperfect moves
  • Taking “messy” action

Because waiting until you feel ready?

That’s just fear in disguise.

You don’t need confidence to start.
You build confidence by starting.

Fear Is Just Drama in Disguise

Fear is sneaky.

It doesn’t always show up as:

  • “I’m scared.”

Sometimes it looks like:

  • Overthinking
  • Procrastination
  • Making things feel bigger than they are

This is what we can call “mindset drama.”

You take a simple action… and turn it into a full-blown internal crisis.

  • “What if it fails?”
  • “What will people think?”
  • “What if I’m not good enough?”

But here’s the reality:

You don’t actually know what’s going to happen.

So why assume the worst?

That’s essentially what imposter syndrome is—
treating an imagined negative outcome as fact.

Balance Matters: Action vs. Awareness

Now, let’s be clear—this isn’t about reckless action.

There are two extremes to avoid:

1. Never Taking Action

You stay stuck.
You overthink everything.
You look up 10 years later… and nothing has changed.

This leads to one thing: regret.

2. Taking Action Without Reflection

You do everything.
You burn out.
You never pause to ask: Is this even working?

This leads to exhaustion and misalignment.

The Sweet Spot: Action + Reflection

The goal is simple:

  • Take action
  • Pause
  • Learn the lesson
  • Adjust
  • Move forward

That’s how you grow.

Not by being perfect.
Not by avoiding mistakes.

But by being willing to:

  • Make the mess
  • Learn from it
  • Keep going

A Necessary Reminder: Be Kinder to Yourself

Here’s something most people don’t realize:

The way you talk to yourself?

It’s often harsher than anything anyone else would say.

You wouldn’t:

  • Talk to your friends like that
  • Speak to your kids like that
  • Tear down someone you love like that

So why are you doing it to yourself?

You don’t need more criticism.
You need more compassion.

Growth doesn’t come from self-punishment.
It comes from self-awareness and support.

The Bottom Line

If you want to move forward in your life or business, you need to:

  • Stop overthinking your every move
  • Stop waiting for validation
  • Stop assuming everyone is watching you

And start:

  • Trusting yourself
  • Taking messy action
  • Letting go of unnecessary pressure

Because the truth is…

It’s not that serious.

And the moment you realize that?

Everything gets lighter.
Everything gets clearer.
And you finally start moving.


Your Next Step

If this resonated with you, don’t just nod along and move on.

Take a moment to ask yourself:

  • What would I do differently if I truly believed nobody was watching?
  • Where am I holding myself back right now?
  • What’s one messy action I can take today?

And then… go do it.

Want the Full Breakdown?

This is just the surface.

In the full podcast episode, you’ll hear:

  • The mindset shifts that changed everything
  • Real-life examples of getting out of your own way
  • Practical ways to stop overthinking and start moving

🎧 Go listen to the full episode and start applying this in real time.

And when you do?
Send a message and share what shifted for you.

hi, i'm
alora

I help wedding photographers book their highest package, double their prices, and make $100k with 10
weddings a year. 
 
Here we we come up with strategies by reverse engineering the goal. We scale a business so we can start a new one, and most of all–we do this without burning out. 

3 steps to booking 

as a photographer

In this masterclass, I'll show you a behind the scenes look at building a six-figure wedding photography business without having to book more than 10 weddings a year.

$10K Weddings

Inside Wedding Atelier, we teach you how to make $100k
with 20 weddings a year. It's time to attract dream couples,
book your highest package, and triple your prices to $100k
while getting your weekends back.

When you are finished with Lab 35mm, you will be able to confidently offer clients the one-of-a-kind experience of moment-driven, fine art inspired photography.